Hi, human. It’s me — Molly. Queen of naps, destroyer of couches, master of the art of the dramatic stretch.
Today, I’m going to show you how to build my dream scratching post — because your carpet deserves a break, and so do your poor legs.
😼 Why Bother?
You could buy one, but where’s the fun in that?
A DIY post means:
✨ Taller for my big kitty yoga moves
✨ Wrapped in the perfect scratchy stuff
✨ Fancy enough so you stop whining about your “aesthetic”
✨ And best of all — it’s mine (and not your arm).
🎒 What You Need to Fetch
Go on — get these things ready, servant:
🪵 A sturdy wooden post — 3 feet tall or taller, because I’m extra.
🪚 A nice wide base — no tipping over while I do my epic claw routine.
🧶 Sisal rope — LOTS. Like 50–100 feet. Go big or I’ll shred your sofa again.
🧷 Screws, a drill, glue gun, staple gun — the usual noisy stuff.
🧩 Carpet bits (optional but fancy).
🍃 Catnip — obviously.
🐾 How to Make It (So I Approve)
1️⃣ Build the Base of My Throne
Cut a big, sturdy base. Smooth out the edges — I don’t want splinters on my royal paws, thank you very much.
2️⃣ Bolt Down the Post
Stick the post smack in the middle and screw it down tight. If it wobbles, I’ll knock it over and pretend it wasn’t me.
3️⃣ Wrap It Up, Human
Start at the bottom — staple or glue the end of the rope. Wrap it tight all the way up. I want maximum claw resistance. Any gaps? I’ll find them. And shred them.
4️⃣ Bonus Bling
Stick a carpet scrap on top. Or dangle a toy from it. Or both! I demand enrichment.
5️⃣ Sprinkle the Magic
Catnip, of course. A little sprinkle on the rope to make it irresistible. Maybe I’ll roll on it too. For your entertainment.
✅ Molly’s Final Royal Commands
- Put my new post somewhere dramatic — by the window, next to my nap throne, or right in the middle of the room so everyone sees me being majestic.
- Clap when I use it. Give treats. Praise me. I expect it.
- Take a picture for my fan club.
Ta-da! You did it! Now sit back and watch me shred like the magnificent feline I am — while your furniture lives to see another day.
You’re welcome.
Purrs and judgment,
Molly the Magnificent 🐾👑✨
